


Accidental Baby Acquisition

by damalur



Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-28
Updated: 2012-09-28
Packaged: 2017-11-15 04:44:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/523279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/damalur/pseuds/damalur
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oops.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Accidental Baby Acquisition

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Odyle and the Tumblr Tropes Meme. I don't always write about babies, but when I do, I usually make a tasteless joke.

Belle eyed the thing suspiciously. It was gleaming, but in this situation, that wasn't a desirable state, since the sheen came from its own snot.

"You're a very messy sort of baby," she told it.

"Most babies are, dear," Rumpelstiltskin said, idly, paying more attention to his business at the stove than to her staredown.

"It's very...leaky," Belle said. "What do I do with it?"

"You might try picking it up," he said, and dabbed a bit of milk on the inside of his wrist.

" _You_ pick it up," she challenged.

He chuckled at her, turned around, and hefted the baby up in one practiced motion. "I thought you were supposed to be the brave one."

"You can be brave this time," Belle said, but she couldn't quite hide how captivated she was by the sight of her lover holding a child. Although—probably better she didn't ask.

But _someone_ had to raise the question—

"You didn't steal that baby, did you?"

Rumpelstiltskin rolled his eyes. "I've been out of the baby trade for a while now, dearie, although it seems that the rest of the town has yet to figure that out. No, this one was left in front of the shop."

"That's awful!"

"Some parents are, you know," he said, and offered the baby a bottle. It latched on right away, its funny little face scrunching up in pleasure.

Belle edged a little closer. "What are you going to do with it?"

"Well," Rumpelstiltskin said, "I had thought to boil it, but I'm afraid I don't have a large enough pot, so I suppose it'll have to be baked."


End file.
